Margaret Vasquez explained that emotions aren’t who we are. Rather, they are similar to physical sensations. When we feel something hot, cold, sharp, or painful, our bodies are alerting us to approach with caution something in our environment. When we feel emotions––big and small––our mind is alerting us to something internal that deserves our attention.
The world might seem to have a lot to offer, but as it applies to the caring of a child or loved one with special needs, it offers us things that won’t make us happy and won’t deliver what we need. The world will always lack authenticity and the act of serving will not be very high on the rung of the ladder, by world standards.
God convicted me. He challenged how much I believed it. What would my and my husband’s actions tell us? Were we believing God for His plan for our son, or were we expecting Him to help with ours? Were we open to the possibility that His plans might be different from what we’ve envisioned?
Did I trust God’s plan for the life of my child with disabilities? Did I trust God’s plan for the life of my child with disabilities during his frequent medical crises as a baby? Did I trust God’s plan for the life of my child with disabilities when he was a young adult? Do I trust his plans now?
When we care for our child(ren) with special needs, it’s self-sacrificing. It is more than a “job” as some might say, it is an undertaking (as one of my friends shared so succinctly with me). Yet some of us have a different level and depth of care. Although our son needs 24/7 attention and care, he can do a good number of things on his own. Cindi Ferrini shares the difference between Self-less and Selfless.
I’ve come to realize that one of the greatest reasons He sent me out on the road was to teach me lessons through running that apply to the journey of being a special needs parent. Over and over I encounter similarities between the two. Most recently I discovered something that I truly was not expecting. I believe the Lord showed me this about running so that I would apply it to the rest of my life.
This morning, as I planned for the day, I saw that my son’s physical therapist would be coming to the house this afternoon. This morning there was a moment when I felt like a failure, but that feeling quickly passed. I remembered how several years back, that feeling often lingered with me for days at a time, but not anymore.
